My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize