The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
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