their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
i should start naming my morning wood
great idea but wrong number
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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