so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
