I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
NoShamevember. You game?
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
