So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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