i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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