Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
