Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
