yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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