I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Randomize
