I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
If my bosses could see, smell or hear me right now they would understand why its a horrible idea to keep the office open sundays
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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