Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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