Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
Randomize
