I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
they need to just BURY HIM!
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
Randomize
