i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
