I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
He wanted me to blow him while he did curls and looked at himself in the mirror. Not sure if gay or ego maniac.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
