apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
