i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I AM VODKA MAN
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Randomize