just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Her fucking playlist had randy newman on it. It was like woody was watching the whole time.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Dick very happy bro
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
