I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize