How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
We need to get her a baby shower present. And no, a blow up sex doll with her dead boyfriends picture stuck to it, is not appropriate.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize