nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize
