You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
3pm strippers are depressing
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
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