you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
