How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
it hurts more in the daytime
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
