I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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