We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
threw up during christmas carols. the audience at the church seemed to immediately know i was a college student
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
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