Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Randomize
