would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
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