We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
There can only be one screw up per family and I was here first. Get your shit together bro
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
