you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
