I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
