who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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