I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
He just told me he would murder a thousand dolphins to be with me. Quite the charmer.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
Randomize
