Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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