will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Randomize
