Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
