The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
When you have to have Siri remind you that you're on your period cuz you're so drunk you keep forgetting about tampons it might be time to call it a night.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
