Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
The feeling are messing with the penis
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
Randomize
