i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
