Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
It's blow job season.
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
