so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I wish there was an emoji for sad lady boners
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize
