He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I just broke into my house with a butter knife. It kinda scares me just how easy that was.
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