8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize