So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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