ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Randomize