i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
