if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
Randomize