Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize