Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
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